Siren

What I love about Montessori school. And a few things I don’t love.

February 1, 2010 · Leave a Comment

Where has the time gone? Brody just received his first report card. His first “official” report card for the first grade. Oh sure, he got some scribbles in Kindergarten, but Brody was the teacher’s pet in KG… Brody could do no wrong in Miss Delmy’s eyes. But first grade? They are a little harder on their students and have more kids to deal with (10 vs 40). Brody was late 4 days this semester. I was responsible for 1 of those late days (for those of you keeping track (hence me), 25%). He only missed 1 day.  No bad, I’d say. By the time I’d finished first grade, I’d missed 12.5 days.

Not only did we get the report card, we got instructions for the grading system (very helpful) and “guidelines” that should be followed if we were going to share the report card with our child. We were told the report card is written for parents, not children. If we “decide” to discuss the report with our child, we need to make sure we emphasize their strengths and gently redirect their challenges.

Gone is the anxiety, gone are the grades that indicated F for fail, etc. Now, the children are assigned numbers (1 through 5), 1 for “experiencing difficulty with the end of the year grade level standards” and 5 for “advanced demonstration of grade level state standards.” This part, I do not like so much. The number system seems so gentle… so non-threatening. Teachers need to put the fear of failing into a student, what the heck is a number going to do?  I guess I’m a little old school.

The report is broken down into four sections; mathematics, cultural studies, language arts and (wait for it) life long learning skills. Life long learning skills include such categories as intrinsic motivation, social responsibility, stewardship, good citizenship and confidence. There are many other categories as well (such as the ability to accept external authority). Apparently, Brody usually works for the apparent pleasure of so doing but rarely demonstrates mastery by showing others. He always completes work to the agreed upon criteria (he gets that from me) but only sometimes replaces materials in good condition when finished (he gets that from his dad). My son is a critical thinker!  This is what I love about Montessori! My parents were never told, throughout my entire history of school, that I was a critical thinker. Or that I had social responsibility. Or that I had the ability to accept external authority.  Back in my day, you had to accept external authority otherwise our parents would hear about it and then YOU were in real trouble. 

Thanks to my mom, I have my first grade report card. The comments on my card said “Melodie is a confident reader. She is also a good little worker. I’ve enjoyed her “down to earth” approach.” And my favorite comment “Dear Melodie, Have a happy summer! Thanks for being such a happy little girl!” Gotta love Mrs. Victoor (and I truly did, she was awesome). Other comments were “study of Japan, nutrition, Norway, pioneers and Eskimos.” Vague with very little detail.  In the comments section on Brody’s report, Brody’s teachers mentioned they want Brody to offer more help and take more responsibilities in the classroom. Their goal for Brody is to become a role model for his peers.  Comments include “He is comfortable working on dynamic addition and subtraction abstractly” (although abstractly sounds like a made-up word, it’s not. However, I have found his teachers like to make up their own words on occasion). “Brody is going to be working on dynamic multiplication soon.” Really? I am not sure I even know what dynamic multiplication is – never mind accomplishing it in the first grade.

What is truly shocking is the part where his teachers say Brody usually demonstrates concentration, patience and persistence because I have never seen him use these skills at home. Unless he’s playing a video game. It’s kind of like the time I called his kindergarten teacher and asked her how she handled his constant whining. Her response was “Brody does not whine, he communicates with me quite well.” Really.

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Hello 2010!!

December 31, 2009 · Leave a Comment

I don’t know about you, but I am so done with 2009. I am ready for a fresh start! A new year! It’s time to clean out the closet and start again. I love starting a new year, you have so many hopes, dreams and goals.

2009 was not the best year I’ve ever had. I don’t think it was the worst either. I believe 1994 was the worst year, I lost both grandfathers that year.

Let’s sum up the year:

  • Brody started the first grade!
  • Evan started kindergarten!
  • I did an amazing amount of soul searching and really discovered who I am and what I want in life
  • I started a great job
  • I finished my Associate’s Degree (I have the diploma to prove it)
  • I branched out of myself (and my introvertedness and social awkwardness) and met some amazing new friends
  • I stopped lying; to myself, to my children, to everyone (hard to admit I lied, but it’s human nature so I’m told).
  • I stopped taking things and people for granted
  • My parents visited! Hooray!
  • My cat Minnie had a dirty weekend, got pregnant, contracted fleas and completely ruined my entire summer. How, you ask? The fleas that infested Minnie, infested my house and nearly drove me crazy. The kittens were super adorable and all have lovely, lovely homes now.
  • I went to Edmonton, Vancouver and Vegas (twice)
  • Michael moved out
  • My father in law passed away
  • The boys spent the summer in Canada getting to know my family
  • I experienced some of the darkest days of my entire lift

See what I mean? Not a bad year, not the best year – but definitely a memorable year. I feel blessed to have made progress on my life journey. I’ve discovered the adult version of the girl I once was. A girl I’ve missed terribly for so many years. I’ve regained my inner voice and actually started listening! For once in my life, I have looked in the mirror and actually loved what my body looked like. I am able to laugh at myself and be honest with the people in my life – these two factors have improved my quality of life immensely.

I no longer feel guilty for taking time for myself. I don’t feel guilty for being who I am and doing things I love. I am blessed to have healthy children, a loving family and fabulous friends.  Happy New Year – I am wishing you the absolute best for 2010!

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Oh Christmas! I am so done with you!

December 23, 2009 · Leave a Comment

For the first time, in my entire life, I am done with Christmas shopping early! I’ve been done for a couple of weeks and I couldn’t be more proud! I’m going to be able to enjoy Christmas Eve rather than fight the crowds at the mall! Beerita’s here I come!  I’ve decided egg nog is not worth the calorie intake – so I’m switching my Christmas drink to Margarita’s with half beer (hence beerita).

Brody really cracks me up sometimes… he didn’t want to go see Santa at the mall this year, because “he’s not the real Santa – so what’s the point?” Which led to “Well, he’s a representative of the real Santa and it’s nice to have a picture with him.” Which then progressed into, “Nah… I just don’t want to go.” Ok fine.  I’m ok with NOT paying $54 for a Christmas photo with Santa – I’d rather take my own photos anyway!

Over the weekend we watched The Grinch with Jim Carrey (a tradition in my house) and will probably watch A Christmas Story on Friday. Last night the boys and I made paper snowflakes and had 2 video skype calls. I love SKYPE!!  It was really cool to be able to see my mom, my neice and nephew with hints of my brother! Although the kids did spend an enormous time calling each other names and sticking their tongues out it turned out to be an awesome call!

Everyone at the house has been sick. I’m just starting to feel better (aka less snotty) and the boys are still dealing with mucous and coughing. Evan is the worst child when he is sick. I told my mom it was like having my dad, my brother and Michael (when they are sick) wrapped up into one little body. I know he doesn’t mean to be cranky, but yesterday he cried for 30 minutes over a piece of paper I threw in the garbage. I finally told him he wasn’t allowed to talk to me about the paper. Then… 20 minutes later he said “I really cared about that paper!” and started to cry again. sigh… It’s times like this when I really appreciate children’s cold medicine! I feel bad for him. As a side note… Evan’s bottom tooth has been hurting and Brody said “you know what’s coming right? it’s gonna fall out!” which made Evan very excited! I told him he’s on his way to becoming a toothless wonder!

Needless to say, the boys are super excited about Christmas. I can’t wait to see their smiling little faces when they open their presents! Happy Holidays everyone!

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Evan and his amazing Christmas list

December 8, 2009 · 1 Comment

Evan is your typical five year old. He loves the Toys R Us catalog and always calls “dibs” on it when it arrives in October. He’s really got a knack for picking out items he wants. As you can see in this photo, Evan has circled almost everything – including the props.

He circled the ball! It's a prop...

He circled items he already owns:

And this:

He’s even managed to circle (and want more than anything else in the word, including chocolate milk and smooches from his mommy) the absolute impossible gifts – the items we could never own (one item won’t fit in our shoebox and the other item would kill him):

Really? Because, we live in a shoebox - where would we put it?

and the ever attainable:

Really? We just took his training wheels off the NON-rocket powered bike.

I love this kid so much.

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Tahoe!

December 7, 2009 · 1 Comment

A very large group of friends spent this past weekend in South Lake Tahoe. I had such a good weekend and I think I know why. Don’t laugh, but I believe it was the weather! While I do love the sun and sand, I am a winter girl. Always have been.  Even on the coldest days, I am still a happy camper.

I remember when Bob and I were kids, we’d spend hours building snow forts or skating. We also spent hours and hours on the crazy carpet (apparently, this is a Canadian item, because most Americans have no clue what a crazy carpet is) behind the skidoo. We were typical Canadian kids, winter was 8-9 months long so you learned how to enjoy it. This past weekend was cold and while others were freezing, I knew exactly how to block out the cold so I wouldn’t shiver.

I think I’ll be spending more time in Tahoe… might be time to start looking for a timeshare.

→ 1 CommentCategories: Melodie · Weekend

Decency… where did it go?

November 22, 2009 · Leave a Comment

I think if you call someone, they should have the decency to return the call. It seems people have lost their decency these days and as the holidays get closer, the decency level has dropped. Just last week, a woman walked right in front of me and her shoulder clipped mine as she kept walking without even saying a word. I tried to merge on the freeway and almost got sideswiped because the car in the merge lane wasn’t going to let me in.

What is wrong with people? Is it me? I always ask this question first, it’s natural for me to think this thought first. Maybe my expectations for people are too high? Maybe I have unrealistic views of how humans should treat one another? I’m the type of person who will say “bless you” when you sneeze. I’ll ask you if you’d like something to eat or drink when you come to my house. I will let you merge onto the freeway without trying to kill you or your passengers. But I will not put up with rude people who do not have the decency to return phone calls.

You know society has hit an all time low when the mall posts signs in the doorways titled “Common rules of courtesy.”

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The weather

November 4, 2009 · 1 Comment

Because, you know, that’s what people talk about when they don’t have anything else to say. Oh I’m sure I can drum up some conversations – but I’ve been so darn busy!

The other day, my friend Amanda was complaining how it was cold and rainy where she is – so I took this picture outside of my office.

Beautiful day

It was as warm and gorgeous as it looks.

This is the view outside of my window. When people think of Oakland, I am very sure this is not the image that comes to mind. It was about 75 F and look at that gorgeous skyline!

School

I finished school last week, actually earned a degree. Not a fake one either! It’s a recognized degree from an accredited school. I have four more years left of school and should be starting my Bachelor program the week of the 22nd (of November). There are no classes listed on the website yet, so maybe I’m starting later? Who knows, all I know is I am so happy to have some real time away from school. When I told the boys I wouldn’t have homework for the next couple of weeks, you’d have thought I told them we won the lottery! In a way, I guess we did.

Visits

Mom and Dad are visiting next week – they will be here for one whole week! Dad has requested a list of chores to do and mom is going to help me pickle beets and make perogies (YUM). May not sound like much to an American, but to a Canadian… those two foods are sent from heaven! I’m hoping they will help me with the inside and outside of the house, I’m hoping they can help motivate me to get rid of all the clutter and old crap hanging around. Mom said she wants to go shopping (and is even bringing an extra suitcase for all the loot). Good thing I like to shop!

The boys are super excited to be able to host their grandparents in California! I’ll have the boys with me the entire week so they can spend extra time with g’ma and g’pa. Luckily, I have a good enough relationship with their dad – so switching like this is easy.  The best part about the visit, is the entire week I am taking off from work! YAHOO!!

Holidays

Michael has the boys for Thanksgiving and Christmas this year. I don’t really care about Thanksgiving – but I think Christmas might find me under the tree with a case of wine. If anyone is looking to send a present… you know what to send! My cousin Michael and his new wife are going to be in San Francisco sometime during the Christmas season – so hopefully I’ll get to see them and meet the new girl! It sucks to live so far away from family, but I am happy they are visiting. Michael wants to see Alcatraz – you can tell he’s never been to SF before because he will freeze his willies off. However, Mikey is a big Canadian guy (who I have personally seen eat half of a 26 lb turkey, plus all the fixin’s AND dessert) so I’m sure he can handle it. It’s his wife I am concerned about. I told them to expect cold – but Mikey just laughed it off. Laugh it up chuckles!

Other news

In the beginning of December, a whole gaggle of us are headed up to Tahoe for some snow fun. I was asked (I shall not name names) if I would be bringing my snow pants for the occasion and I replied “I’m not going skiing or snowboarding.” Which was met with “what about for just walking around?” I, again, replied “Nope.” Then I thought… geez am I missing something here? Should I bring my snow pants?  Luckily, the internet was created for questions exactly like this. I was able to see the weather forecasts for the past year and after converting the F’s to C’s determined that the weather in Tahoe is short sleeve weather for all Canadians (-6 to +10 C on average). I am thinking about going tubing – so I’ll bring my pants if the tubing thing pans out. Otherwise, look for me at the outdoor pool! I’ll be the one sunning myself on a chaise lounge chair!

The trip should be really good – except everyone has high expectations. You all know what happens when expectations are really high…. the trip usually sucks! Hopefully, between the free shuttles to the casinos and night life AND the large Costco sized bottles of tequila, we’ll have a good time.

Oh and it’s my birthday next week… so look for birthday celebration shenanigans.

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Brody….

October 23, 2009 · Leave a Comment

We had our first parent-teacher conference with Brody’s teacher yesterday.  As parents I am not sure what we were expecting. We’ve had conferences with teachers before, but kindergarten is very different than Grade One (oh sorry, First Grade). Miss Delmy (kindergarten teacher) and Brody had a very close relationship, Brody adored her and vice versa. She knew she could count on Brody to help with the other students or to refill the stapler – pretty much anything in the classroom.  In Brody’s school right now, he is in a class with Second and Third grade students and is low man on the totem pole (so to speak). Academically, Miss Sharon says he’s doing great but he’s having some adjustment issues.

Brody… the boy who was made for the montessori system of learning is having adjustment issues. Apparently he wanders around the classroom like he’s lost and doesn’t know how to focus. Miss Sharon says he loves to make announcements in the class, loves to be the helper – so then why doesn’t she facilitate more opportunities for him to be the helper? Because there are 39 students and 2 teachers. He is used to 1 teacher and 8-10 students. He’s the little fish in the big pond and I get understand where he’s coming from.  I know he’s adjusting to a new situation and I’ve got to give the kid a break… he’s had to deal with a lot of change this past year.  His dad and I no longer live in the same house, his grandfather died, he started in first grade in a new school with new people… That is a lot for anyone, let alone a 6 year old. I have to remind myself that he is only 6 years old.

Miss Sharon is confident that she and the other teacher can help Brody move towards positive behaviour and she is encouraging us to focus on his positive behaviours rather than negative. The thing is, Brody is very smart and knows exactly what he’s doing – he doesn’t need to act out at home because he gets a lot of attention from me and his dad. At school… well, I think he feels he’s lost in the shuffle of children.

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The weekend yo

September 28, 2009 · Leave a Comment

I had a dinner party this past weekend. It turned out really good and I think everyone had a great time. The best part? I was the only woman! Way to increase my odds!  heh heh

Seriously, everyone knows I have some really great girlfriends (most of them live somewhere else, but I have a few who live close) - but I tend to make friends with guys (they are way easier and take less time to get ready). It’s been that way my entire life and I haven’t quite yet figured it out. I’m sure some of my girlfriends know the answer. Anyway, I’m not complaining, in fact, I like that I can hang with guys and be comfortable and relaxed.

Brody loves to entertain. That kid is going to be an event planner! He loves the idea of people coming over and loves to help. He doesn’t like to help with actual work, but he will “help” with entertaining. On Saturday night he made everyone sit in their chairs so he could show them rocks he’d collected. A big hit with the guys!

It’s been hard adjusting to single life – there are parts that are very easy. Then there are parts that totally suck. Preparing for a dinner party on your own is one of the sucky parts.  Fortunately for me, one of my friends ROCKS in the kitchen and he whipped up some amazing appy’s. We had delicious fresh oysters with some concoction Louisiana Joe whipped up as a topping to the oysters (a BIG shout out to Joe for shuckin em too!), Bryan made some delicious cheesy garlic bread (fortunately he made too much so I had it for lunch the next day) and the best salad I have ever eaten. I made ricotta stuffed manicotti and a pork roast. Oh and did I mention the margaritas? Yowzers!!  I did a bottle count the next day and those boys could drink some beers!

Seriously, one of the best nights I’ve had in a long time. It was great to sit around the firepit in the backyard and talk shit. I’m still trying to convince Jason to learn this (NSFW) so he can teach me and we can be the oldest white people on the planet doing the crip walk.

→ Leave a CommentCategories: Brody · Friends · Melodie · Weekend

I tried something new!

September 20, 2009 · Leave a Comment

I know, I know – y’all think I’m lying. But I swear to all things chocolate that I tried something new this weekend. I am normally not a risk taker or an adrenaline junkie – so agreeing to go white water rafting was something out of my comfort level. Over the past 10 months or so, I have been working really hard on creating friendships with good people. You’d be surprised at all the duds (not good friends) that I’ve met along the way.

My friend Joey is the organizer extraordinaire. He planned a white water rafting trip and I agreed to accompany him and his girl Brooke on the trip.  We had some other friends lined up but I hadn’t spent any significant amount of time with them – so it would include new(ish) people as well (except Keith, he and I go waaaaay back). This week has been craptastic and I was not looking forward to getting up at 6:30 am on a Saturday morning so I could help Joey cross another “must-do” off his list.

After finishing homework on Friday night, my girl Jenn and I went to the Rellik for a beer. We had a great time flirting shamelessly with the bartender and bar back (don’t you just love that name?).  Jenn showed Ed (the bartender) and I some amazing photos and we had a really great time. In fact, it was 2:00 am before we left the bar! By the time I got home and got ready for bed, it was close to 3:00 am. (gasp). A mere 3.5 hours later and I was up – getting ready for the 2 hour drive up to the south fork of the American River. 

Can I just say, the lack of sleep and long drive was worth every single minute! Every anxiety or period of bitchiness I had was worth it! I had one of the best days EVER! Not only was the rafting amazing, but the people I connected with have confirmed that I am finally on the right path with friends!

We ran the river! EXTREME!  We were on the “slow” part of the river so that means, Class 2 and 3 rapids. But the experience and memories we created as a group of friends made up for the slower parts of the river. We had an amazing time and are planning another trip. Who’s in?

→ Leave a CommentCategories: Melodie